Universe: Conker

Debut:  Conker’s Pocket Tales (1999)

Aliases: None

Gender: M

Species: Naughty Squirrel

Affiliations: None

Kirby Hat: Conker ears and tail

Alternative Textures: Commando Conker

Availability: Unlockable

Background: This little guy is known for his graphic violence, sexual themes, crude language and potty humor. And people went nuts over it! Seemingly cute and cuddly, Conker’s alcoholism is the least of his problem as he often finds himself in dangerous and absurd situations. Look at it this way, how many games you you get to blow away evil teddy bears?

Reasoning: This seemingly cute nutcase can kick some serious tail and again I think is very much underrated. He fits the aesthetic for SSB and has an arsenal of attacks.

Probability: He is a Rare mascot, and as I pointed out earlier Rare does not like to share. They’re like a greedy child IMO. I wonder if Microsoft will do a riff on SSB like Sony did? If they did then that’s where you’d see characters like Conker, Banjo-Kazooie and Master Chief.

Thoughts: I know how unlikely this may seem, but he’s a great character. SSB is all about variety and even if he is 3rd party I think he brings a lot to the fight.


Power: ***
Weight: **
Defense: ***
Speed: ***
Jump: ***
Recovery: ***
Endurance: ***


One thought on “Conker

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